Teacher. Coach. Wife. Mom. Former Athlete. Former Grad Student. Daughter. Sister.

At every moment in my life, if you introduced yourself to me, I would say, “Hi, I’m Mallory. I……

“I teach 8th grade, High School Summit and Yearbook.”
“I’m coaching the Varsity Volleyball team.”
“I’m Josh’s wife and Lincoln’s mom.”
“I’m on the volleyball team here.”
“I’m a graduate assistant in the athletics department.”

And so on.

And I’ve always been a competitive person that’s held myself to very high standards. So when I feel I have too many things going wrong or even just not perfectly at once, I am my own toughest critic. I’ve always told myself I was lazy. In this last year, I’ve had to work on just giving myself a break.

I started the remote programming through Dissent right after I was cleared for exercise after having my daughter, Lincoln. I was staying at home (mainly because I tried to move during a pandemic and thought I would be able to get a job easily which was not accurate) and I had time to do some simple bodyweight movements during the short nap times Lincoln gave me. I didn’t feel strong again yet, but I was very proud and grateful my body could still move and do work for me. I gave myself a break here.

Then came the whirlwind of starting a new job which turned from one teaching prep and assistant coaching, to three teaching preps and Varsity coaching. I live thirty minutes away from my school, so I am up at 5:45 and don’t get home most days until 6pm — 9 pm on game days. I spend my little free time lesson planning and prepping meals for myself and my daughter for the next day. Sometimes now, I do a pretty terrible job at cutting myself some slack. Even writing this now, all I can think is wow, that still just sounds like a lot of excuses.

But it’s not. There are times in life where I need to just slow down, make a plan for the day, and take it one step at a time. I have to remind myself that I’m not lazy just because I’m not going a million miles per hour. I make one thing a habit and then add on rather than trying to start too many new things at once. For this time in my life, it was becoming a mom, then starting a new job, then getting a handle on coaching. And when I feel I’m into a good rhythm with that, I can actively plan to push myself into more strenuous exercise.

What remote programming has allowed me to do is just slow down, take the pressure off, and actually talk to someone about what can work best for me based on my goals. Right now, I focus a lot on mobility and that has allowed me to actually jump in and practice with my team. I get to make them just that much better because I can play volleyball again without having to worry about getting hurt or pushing it too hard.

And I’m okay with that. I’m actually more than okay with that. I’m excited that I’ve been treating my body well and knowing that it is fine if I can’t fit everything into the day. I want my daughter to grow up knowing we take care of our bodies and our minds, whatever that may look like at the time.

That’s not being lazy. That’s a paradigm shift.